Am I too sensitive or I actually need to take some actions

[supermike]

I work for a call centre. I am not an agent. I work for IT support team.

Supporting staff and agents work in the different areas. But we share the cafeteria and washroom.

There is a male agent who really makes me uncomfortable. He is about 50 years old, white. I am a visible minority. I don't know this guy at all. I don't know his name. I never talked to him.

Every time I pass by this guy in the cafeteria or washroom, he starts cursing without looking at me . I didn't pay attention in the first place. I know some uneducated people are rude. :) I didn't think he was cursing me because he didn't look at me. However, after It happened several times, I couldn't help thinking he was aiming at me because it is strange that the guy starts cursing every time I pass by him.

Then it happened again in the washroom this afternoon. I was facing the the wall in front of the urinal. I heard somebody start cursing "here u go, you f**ing as***hole" inside the toilet stall behind me. I thought somebody was talking on the cell. So I didn't mind much. The guy came out of the stall when I was washing hands in less than 1 minute. It was him again!

I was sure he wasn't talking on the phone. And I was sure there were only he and I in the washroom. I am sure he could see me if he was standing in the stall because he is quite tall. He didn't say anything in front of me.

I started feeling very uncomfortable when I thought about it again later. Is it too weird that this guy starts cursing every time I pass by him?

Am I too sensitive? Or I need to find out this guy's name and report all this to the HR to let the company take some actions? Am I overreacting? I mean he might lose his job because of this. Or I just ignore this guy? I can go to the washroom upstairs to avoid seeing this guy.

Any advice would be appreciated! Thanks!

[MrKap]

OP, you could also be going schizophrenic. Are you working too hard?

Do you feel the sting of the curse words, as if they were sending shivers down your spine sort of thing? Do the curse words call out to you?

I am not a psychologist.

But, if you can't befriend the person, or if it is something that is beyond that, maybe you should consider time off?

Have you tried talking to him? Or is he out to lunch?

[sandikosh]

Yes he is cursing you! Now go get him fired!

[particleman]

Wow, that sounds like the type crazy person you see on the street sometimes talking to himself and yelling at everyone. I would definitely report it to a manager. Does he yell when anyone is around or just you?

[Agafaba]

I work for a call centre. I am not an agent. I work for IT support team.

Supporting staff and agents work in the different areas. But we share the cafeteria and washroom.

There is a male agent who really makes me uncomfortable. He is about 50 years old, white. I am a visible minority. I don't know this guy at all. I don't know his name. I never talked to him.

Every time I pass by this guy in the cafeteria or washroom, he starts cursing without looking at me . I didn't pay attention in the first place. I know some uneducated people are rude. :) I didn't think he was cursing me because he didn't look at me. However, after It happened several times, I couldn't help thinking he was aiming at me because it is strange that the guy starts cursing every time I pass by him.

Then it happened again in the washroom this afternoon. I was facing the the wall in front of the urinal. I heard somebody start cursing "here u go, you f****ing as***hole" inside the toilet stall behind me. I thought somebody was talking on the cell. So I didn't mind much. The guy came out of the stall when I was washing hands in less than 1 minute. It was him again!

I was sure he wasn't talking on the phone. And I was sure there were only he and I in the washroom. I am sure he could see me if he was standing in the stall because he is quite tall. He didn't say anything in front of me.

I started feeling very uncomfortable when I thought about it again later. Is it too weird that this guy starts cursing every time I pass by him?

Am I too sensitive? Or I need to find out this guy's name and report all this to the HR to let the company take some actions? Am I overreacting? I mean he might lose his job because of this. Or I just ignore this guy? I can go to the washroom upstairs to avoid seeing this guy.

Any advice would be appreciated! Thanks!

I doubt its you he is cursing at, how would he have known it was you in the bathroom anyway? More than likely its a mental disorder or thats how he deals with all the stupid calls he has to take.

[Simaahoy]

Next time he does it talk to him and ask him if everything is alright. If he then target's you and your are uncomfortable withit either report him or avoid being around him. Sounds like a psycho

[supermike]

OP, you could also be going schizophrenic. Are you working too hard?

Do you feel the sting of the curse words, as if they were sending shivers down your spine sort of thing? Do the curse words call out to you?

I am not a psychologist.

But, if you can't befriend the person, or if it is something that is beyond that, maybe you should consider time off?

Have you tried talking to him? Or is he out to lunch?

Hey, calm down. what's wrong with you? I was simply telling what happened to me and what I thought. I didn't actually say anything or do anything to this guy. Don't you feel strange when the same person starts cursing every time you pass by him? Geez!

[supermike]

I doubt its you he is cursing at, how would he have known it was you in the bathroom anyway? More than likely its a mental disorder or thats how he deals with all the stupid calls he has to take.

I think he was standing in the stall because he came out in less than 1 minute. As I said, he could see people outside the stall because he is quite tall.

[stuntman]

Next time he does it talk to him and ask him if everything is alright. If he then target's you and your are uncomfortable withit either report him or avoid being around him. Sounds like a psycho

-1000

You say the guy sounds like psycho but the OP should talk to him and ask him about his outburst?

Yes, you see what I am getting at.

[anyasok]

Turret's syndrome?

[sylpherware]

Maybe he has a digestive problem that acts up when he's sh*tting and eating?

I would've just ask "hey, you all right there, buddy?"

[stuntman]

Ask another employee about the person and ask them if that is normal for that person.
Ask a manager about the employee if you still feel uncomfortable.
After that ask HR if the Manager does not get results (its the managers job).

See how that works out.

[supermike]

Wow, that sounds like the type crazy person you see on the street sometimes talking to himself and yelling at everyone. I would definitely report it to a manager. Does he yell when anyone is around or just you?

I don't know if he starts cursing or not when other people pass by him. His voice is actually low. You only can hear when you pass by him. This is what confused me. Otherwise I do know what to do if somebody explicitly curse me or challenge me.

[Simaahoy]

-1000

You say the guy sounds like psycho but the OP should talk to him and ask him about his outburst?

Yes, you see what I am getting at.

I would just ask him 'if he's alright' be brave! loool ... Just say it out. Just make sure your near the exit do you can run :d

[ishfish]

Turret's syndrome?

The swearing subtype is very very very rare. Mostly it shows up as ticks.


No one should make you uncomfortable at work. Do not feel guilty about reporting such a person - they made their choice. I am curious if there is another "person of minority" who might be able to verify that he behaves that way around him/her too.

[LaserEnvy]

:?::?:

Doesn't seem like that complicated. Just go up to him and ask him if he is cursing at you or not.

[MrKap]

Hey, calm down. what's wrong with you? I was simply telling what happened to me and what I thought. I didn't actually say anything or do anything to this guy. Don't you feel strange when the same person starts cursing every time you pass by him? Geez!

Yes, I do, unfortunately it happens when I am all by myself, usually during high periods of stress after too much work.

I hate the fact that I can associate the voice with someone I know too. It started happening to me last summer, but I started to take it really easy and it's gotten a lot better.


You said you couldn't even see him move his mouth.

[hdave]

What kind of crazy place is RFD turning into. You don't need to ask RFD what to do.

Next time it happens, just ask him if he's talking to you and if everything is okay.
And depending on his response, ask him if he has a problem with you, or if he needs help, or tell him you're going to HR.

[MrKap]

Exactly, OP needs to figure out if he is the one going crazy for being too sensitive, or if the guy is actually swearing at him.

Why can't people approach other people and have a conversation? It's like american psycho.


I don't know what your job is, but this might help decide if you are high risk. Sounds to me like you are a tech troubleshooter whose job is poorly defined, and quite possibly your managing a whole bunch of stuff too...

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20033130


Occupations with higher risk of common mental disorder may be typified by high levels of job demands, especially emotional demands and lack of job security. The reasons why occupations have low rates of common mental disorder are varied and may include high levels of job discretion, good job training and clearly defined job tasks.




The swearing subtype is very very very rare. Mostly it shows up as ticks.

Yes, you will know if someone has turrets. They'll make sure you know. jmo...

[supermike]

Exactly, OP needs to figure out if he is the one going crazy for being too sensitive, or if the guy is actually swearing at him.

Why can't people approach other people and have a conversation? It's like american psycho.


I don't know what your job is, but this might help decide if you are high risk. Sounds to me like you are a tech troubleshooter whose job is poorly defined, and quite possibly your managing a whole bunch of stuff too...

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20033130

Hey. I definitely could hear and understand words like "fuc***","as**hole". I won't feel uncomfortable if people are just moving their lips!

To be honest, I would have reported if somebody say those words in the bank I worked for before no matter he is cursing me or not. Those words are forbidden in workplace! Simple as that! It is not other people's responsibility to understand why you behave like that.

However, I do understand lots of people working in call centres didn't go to university or something.(I am not judging anything, I am simply telling the situation). So I understand if some of them like to talk trash sometimes. As long as they don't curse me. I don't mind much. I was just wondering if he was cursing me! Do you understand?

[MrKap]

If it really makes you nervous, get a tape recorder and you pass by record it. If you can get something on audio, maybe you can take that to your manager.

Me, I would just walk up to the guy, and get to know them, but if that's not a possibility, make sure they are really swearing at you before you start reporting stuff to HR.

The last time I reported to my bosses on how I wasn't getting along with other people in the office, they handed me a business card for a stress management professional.

[HoleyMoley]

There is a male agent who really makes me uncomfortable. He is about 50 years old, white. I am a visible minority. I don't know this guy at all. I don't know his name. I never talked to him.
Every time I pass by this guy in the cafeteria or washroom, he starts cursing without looking at me . I didn't pay attention in the first place. I know some uneducated people are rude. :) ...

How do you know he isn't educated? You admitted you don't know this person at all, but you are comfortable using your prejudice against him to affront him as being uneducated.... yet it sounds like you are accusing him of doing that against you.

From my experience, some of the rudest and most arrogant people are very well-educated.


......
However, I do understand lots of people working in call centres didn't go to university or something.(I am not judging anything, I am simply telling the situation). So I understand if some of them like to talk trash sometimes.....

WOW.
If I worked with you, I'd probably swear at you too.

[ishfish]

Does anyone else - minority or not notice him swearing? Someone earlier suggested he may be doing it to blow off steam. Makes sense as a possibility. I had a coworker who used to do that - very annoying.

[Hansol]

Haha oh my. Simple: stop, look the guy in the eye, and say "Hey, you talking to me?"

:facepalm: This site is bizarre at times....

[bionic21]

I actually know someone who's just like the person you're describing. He would mimic others and whisper curses next to or behind people, and more often then not would have conversations with himself. After knowing him for a few years I've come to know that he's actually a kind person, just someone that's a bit unstable at times.

OP why not address it with him directly otherwise just let it be...unless it gets physical...i must say though it is weird how long has this been going on for?

[jordanr19871]

Haha oh my. Simple: stop, look the guy in the eye, and say "Hey, you talking to me?"

:facepalm: This site is bizarre at times....

+1

or to really get at him just keep walking and whenever he starts swearing look right at him and smile

[tsat]

How do you know he isn't educated? You admitted you don't know this person at all, but you are comfortable using your prejudice against him to affront him as being uneducated.... yet it sounds like you are accusing him of doing that against you.

From my experience, some of the rudest and most arrogant people are very well-educated.

WOW.
If I worked with you, I'd probably swear at you too.

+1

Someone who curses is automatically uneducated? Your prof's at uni obviously did a great job, you seem to be able to have a higher level of understanding than most... But because i'm a country bumpkin I can't comprehend how this is possible. I'm actually surprised you could hear him swearing with your head lodged so far up your a$$.

[ji2o0k]

Be a man...do da right fing!



When you hear him cursing next time you walk by.....just man up and ask him "Are you talking to me? If not, please don't use this type of foul language in the workplace...it is unacceptable"...

Then proceed to write down his name and cubicle number and report to HR about the foul language use and loud tone of voice...


And next time you walk by his cubicle...walk with your arms punching straight out and legs kicking straight out and by chance, happen to punch and kick him... (only if he was cursing at you.....)

[drey2k]

I'd say it is a 99% chance that he is swearing at you. I know people like this who just go crazy when they see someone they don't like (they don't even have to really know this person) and start mimicking them and swearing under their breath. He probably hates something about you. Maybe you are an odd looking guy, maybe you're a bit fem and you have a high voice, maybe you're too dark for him or whatever I don't know but he has it in for you.

What I would do is go up to him in the office (don't do it in the washroom), and ask him if he has a problem with you. This alone will probably shut him up. If it doesn't then go to HR, or if you don't want to get him canned then go to the other washroom, your call.

[particleman]

I don't know, in this instance it is hard to tell if he is cursing at the OP or just venting. A call center is a pretty stressful environment, the people that work there take endless verbal abuse from the people on the other end of the line but can't curse back at the caller directly. It's possible that the guy is cursing quietly about the last person who spoke with on the phone.

Anyways, the only way to know for sure is to ask him directly, or find out if other people there see him cursing all the time too.

[Insider]

tourettes. 99% positive.