Parenting & Family

Dealing with bullies in jk and SK.

  • Last Updated:
  • Mar 10th, 2019 7:23 pm
Newbie
Jul 18, 2012
29 posts
13 upvotes
BRAMPTON
It doesn't seem like the teacher is taking it seriously. If they haven't seen anything serious, it's not a priority. OP, have you talked to the teacher about it and explained the situation? If you have and the teacher or school hasn't done anything, then it's unfortunately up to your kid to defend himself.
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Jun 26, 2005
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Toronto
Cheapo-Findo wrote:
Nov 15th, 2018 1:43 pm
Teach your kid about kicking the family jewel when needed.
LOL
As funny as that sounds, 100% do not teach your kids to do that. Sooooo much lawsuits can come of that. Excessive force, harming sperm, potential progeny procreation loss..... I'd be suing for millions if someone kicked my son's family jewels

I'd teach my kids to do exactly what the other bully did to you. Equal and opposite force. Newton's law
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Jun 26, 2005
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PrinceMS wrote:
Nov 15th, 2018 12:02 pm
I don't think kids can be expelled for more than 2 weeks.
School will have to take him back in.
Useless Canadian school system. We are so weak. Back when I was a kid in Hong Kong, everyone respected teachers. They had power, if the teacher asks for a meeting with the parents, its a BAD thing, means your child was not behaving in school or marks are low. Parents are responsible to ensure children keep up the grades and behave. if you get called into the Principal's office, BIG issue. Expulsion is probably coming.
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Feb 10, 2006
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If your child has to deal with being bullied at such a young age, you must teach them to learn with coping mechanisms on how to deal with such situations. You need to instill in them self confidence and empower them stand up for themselves.

I would make sure to address it early, as you don't want your child to be exposed to it for so long that it could affect them. The positive side is that your child is at least telling you what they are experiencing. Keep at it.

To me moving away would send the wrong message to your child, you can't always run away from your problems in life. This is an opportunity to parent Smiling Face With Open Mouth
Jr. Member
Jun 11, 2006
196 posts
147 upvotes
I think since it's happened several times, it's good to at least have a conversation with the teacher to see if she is aware of it.

Besides that, I would reiterate to your child that it is not ok to be treated like that and reassure him that it is ok to defend himself. You might want to give him useful things to say such as "Stop that" or "I don't like that" (in a loud voice) and maybe go through some scenarios with him about what he can do when/if it happens again.
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Jun 9, 2003
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Markham, ON
...im mixed with self defense for kids...i've ran into a few kids that started to kick and punch my 5 year son for no reason....except their parents explaining that their child learned it from martial arts classes.

if the teacher is shit...then the kid goes around bullying others.

With great power comes great responsibilities...not sure if all 5 yr olds understand that.
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Aug 22, 2011
25695 posts
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Ottawa
thelefteyeguy wrote:
Nov 15th, 2018 4:43 pm
...im mixed with self defense for kids...i've ran into a few kids that started to kick and punch my 5 year son for no reason....except their parents explaining that their child learned it from martial arts classes.

if the teacher is shit...then the kid goes around bullying others.

With great power comes great responsibilities...not sure if all 5 yr olds understand that.
Not at first, but that's why it is important to enroll them in a recognized center that teaches discipline, respect and responsibility.
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Aug 15, 2015
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Markham, ON
I almost forgot we are dealing with five years old here. I'm wondering if the "bully" knows what he is doing is painful to the other child.

Tell your child to proudly cry for help. "Ouch, that hurt!", "Mr/Ms. Whatever so and so is hitting me again".." WAAAHHHHHH!". Does your child have any bruises? Let your child know, there is nothing you can do for him when he's home. He has to catch the bully during the Act.

I mean, hug him and tell him, you feel badly for him but it's hard for you to do anything for him at home. Let him know you believe he can solve his own problem and keep you updated in his progress! In case you really have to step in.
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Nov 13, 2013
1496 posts
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Ottawa
rfdrfd wrote:
Nov 15th, 2018 11:27 am
Everyone's being super PC here. Talking to teacher, is useless. They also are bound by laws and can't do much. I know friends who are teachers.

If a kid doesn't stop, after all the talking by everyone's then talking more is useless.

If a kid hits your kid, tell your kid to hit back. Hit properly. Learn self defense. Physically bullies respond to nothing else. You know it, I know it. I know many co-workers who's high school kids were picked on and only after their retaliated, it stopped. Billy moved onto another victim.

Some bullies may change and stop bullying (unlikely), if not, they will continue, cause it's fun for them. So the only solution for your kid is force the bully to move onto another victim.

The only way is to fight back. So bully will move on.

The main reason a kid that age is a bully is because parents either do nothing, have bad parenting skills or they tried everything and it doesn't work. I've met all these examples.

Those kids will continue and grow up to be a big issue in high school. Get expelled later, other victims will get hurt.
This is kindergarten. No need to teach your kid to be violent at this point. If this was high school I might agree with you and some self defense can never hurt but by the time karate teaches a 5 year old anything useful they will be in a different class and not even remember this. Schools in Ontario are pretty good about dealing with bullying. If they are told they should deal with it swiftly. Of course older kids can still bully outside of school time but at this age doesn't seem like a big worry.
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Aug 22, 2011
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fogetmylogin wrote:
Nov 16th, 2018 2:31 am
This is kindergarten. No need to teach your kid to be violent at this point. If this was high school I might agree with you and some self defense can never hurt but by the time karate teaches a 5 year old anything useful they will be in a different class and not even remember this. Schools in Ontario are pretty good about dealing with bullying. If they are told they should deal with it swiftly. Of course older kids can still bully outside of school time but at this age doesn't seem like a big worry.
I disagree.
I worry more when they are older, as bullying is no longer pushing at this age and can result in extreme violence.
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Jan 17, 2002
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thelefteyeguy wrote:
Nov 15th, 2018 4:43 pm
...im mixed with self defense for kids...i've ran into a few kids that started to kick and punch my 5 year son for no reason....except their parents explaining that their child learned it from martial arts classes.

if the teacher is shit...then the kid goes around bullying others.

With great power comes great responsibilities...not sure if all 5 yr olds understand that.
Yeah my four year old was playing with another one at an indoor playground, getting along very well, smiles all around, and then all of the sudden got kicked in the mouth by him, apparently taking karate classes. My son wanted to take karate or similar but after that incident we decided to wait until grade 3 or so and then determine a martial art for him.

As far as the OP's issue, we would bring up this bullying with the teacher but I would also not hesitate to email the bullying child's parents if they are in the same class. We received a class parent email list in September.
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Feb 25, 2015
976 posts
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York Region
Talk to your child's teacher, if it continues to happen, then Principal, then Superintendent. If all fails, curb stomp the bully's dad and do the Ric Flair swagger walk or get yourself a Lucille and bash some heads.
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May 22, 2016
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Ontario
Keep in mind if the child has been diagnosed with something and the student is special needs than the teacher has their hands tied and can't do anything. If your child fights back than your child will be in trouble.
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Mar 23, 2004
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rfdrfd wrote:
Nov 15th, 2018 3:01 pm
LOL
As funny as that sounds, 100% do not teach your kids to do that. Sooooo much lawsuits can come of that. Excessive force, harming sperm, potential progeny procreation loss..... I'd be suing for millions if someone kicked my son's family jewels
You could sue for millions, you'd get zero. In Ontario parents are not responsible for the torts of a child, unless that child has a known propensity for that behaviour. In this case the only one who would have a propensity for violence would probably be the bully.
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Jun 26, 2005
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Toronto
I know the proper way is to grow and teach your children to be polite, non violent, etc.

Then, they meet kids who's parents do not feel this way. So what happens is your kid ends up being the victim. Victims gets hurt, physically and emotionally.

Talking to teacher, principal, etc. Regardless of age, JK, SK, GR 6, all ends the same when the child doesn't stop, or parents don't care or runs out of ideas on how to make them stop. In Canada, you can't smack or hit your kids when they misbehave. I got whipped on my hand when I did things wrong back in Hong Kong. Heck, even teachers whacked my legs when I swung them while sitting (since my feet didn't touch the ground). Pain certainly is a way to correct behavior.

So, eventually, your kids who are nice and never fights back, they will continue to be picked on. Because in reality, you will continue to meet rude, violent, bullies. Especially Canada is made up of immigrants, they come from countries that are dog eat dog. Due to over population. They are taught to be competitive.

Best is to teach kids not to start a fight, but be able to fight back, when hit. Be careful is useless, how can any one defend against a punch that comes out of nowhere. But if punched, definitely punch back so that kid knows , this is what you get if you wanna punch me again. I bet that kid will never punch your kid again .

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