Parenting & Family

Difficulty with sleep training

  • Last Updated:
  • Oct 22nd, 2018 12:06 pm
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[OP]
Member
Jan 29, 2006
423 posts
17 upvotes
Thanks for the support.

Day 2 went ok, once she got to sleep, she slept for long stretches, Unfortunately because she didn't nap well that day, we had early bedtime at 6pm. After feeding at 9pm she slept until a 2am dream feed. She woke up at 5:15pm. Since her usual bedtime is 8pm, she had a hard time resettling. We left her in bed as not not the reinforce early waking. After a feeding at 7am (since last feed was 2am), she fell asleep, my wife then awoke her up at 8:15am.

Day 3 was picture perfect. She is on a 3 nap schedule, usually a nap of 2hr, then 1.5hrs and a 30min nap. Bedtime was 8pm. We put her to bed, she fell asleep within 10 minutes without a fuss. My wife then dream feed her at 11pm and 4am. She woke up at 7:50am this morning.

Day 4 may be extinction burst night. She didn't sleep well this morning, only sleeping 30min instead of her usual 2 hrs. She seemed a little cranky today. So bedtime was 6:30pm. Tonight she started to fuss/cry, but has now managed to fall asleep. Apparently on extinction burst night, the night will probably be worse, but we are holding up hope for a not too bad night.

I don't think it is teething just yet. There have been many times in the past month when she was fussy that we wondered if she was teething.

I had been pleasantly surprised how quickly the training worked. My wife had been sleeping in the same room as our daughter, now she is back in our room. I wonder whether having mom and milk so close was just too tempting. Our daughter did have a feed to sleep association, I was surprised how quickly it seems to have gone.

These past nights have probably been the best few nights of sleep that my wife and I have had since she was born. We finally don't feel like we are in a permanent state of sleep deprivation. We finally also have some more time together. Things are looking up.
Sr. Member
Sep 3, 2013
759 posts
156 upvotes
Toronto
Please don’t do CIO.
I used the Baby Whisperer method and it took my few weeks to figure it out and customizing it to my own baby’s needs. There’s a forum and other parents (gurus of baby whispering in my opinion) who can help you tweak your routine: forum.babywhisperer.com
I’ve received (free) a lot of help from the mods and now know what to do with my second one. Good luck
Deal Addict
User avatar
Jan 9, 2011
3037 posts
2553 upvotes
Vancouver
OP, I haven't heard the reasons why you want to sleep train. If you are doing it because you've heard that it's best for baby's health and welfare and that sleeping and self-soothing are skills that babies need to acquire, then you should stop. That's totally false. Babies don't need to be trained to sleep any more than they need to be trained to breathe or eat.

Babies don't like to be left alone to sleep. They like to sleep with their parents. Putting a baby into a separate room and left to fall asleep on its own is a very new thing historically—humans have evolved with babies sleeping with their parents.

Sleep training is for getting your baby to sleep when you want it to sleep, not when the baby wants or needs to sleep. Baby wants to be with you, but the cry-it-out method teaches baby that you aren't coming to comfort it no matter how much it cries. So eventually it stops crying. Baby might not even be getting any more sleep at all after sleep training, it might be lying there awake not crying. Some studies have shown that this is exactly what happens with sleep training—baby doesn't sleep more at all, in fact might even be sleeping less, but parents don't know that because they don't hear any crying. A better term for this might be "don't-cry training" instead of sleep training.

Bottom line is that "sleep training" is for the parents, not for baby.
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Deal Guru
User avatar
Mar 31, 2008
10090 posts
1454 upvotes
Toronto
Ricearonie wrote:
Oct 10th, 2018 12:25 pm
We started with our boy at 4 months with the cry it out method. Did his bedtime routine which consisted of a bath, feed and story time, then we turned on his nightlight/music and placed him down. Made sure in the beginning that I (dad) was the only one to check up so he didn't associate mom checking up on him with feedings (we were also weening him off night feeds). Went back every 1 min, 5 min and then 10 min. He got the hang of it in about a week.

My only suggestion is to make sure they're really full off the last feed before they sleep.

Now is a different story since he learned how to roll.... =\ but we expected some regression.
How old is he now? What does he sleep in type of blanket does he use? We had our kids sleep trained by around 4 months as well. The earlier the easier and better! The kid doesn't have the higher level comprehension of what being 'alone' is if you don't let them know it.
Newbie
Jun 7, 2007
62 posts
3 upvotes
Scarborough
at1212b wrote:
Oct 21st, 2018 10:49 pm
How old is he now? What does he sleep in type of blanket does he use? We had our kids sleep trained by around 4 months as well. The earlier the easier and better! The kid doesn't have the higher level comprehension of what being 'alone' is if you don't let them know it.
He is about to turn 6 months, he is still sleeping in sleep sacks. He's been having some issues sleeping lately but I'm just chalking it up to teething and growth phase that he's going through right now. His appetite is not as big as it was last month so he's eating a bit less on his last feed so he wakes up a bit earlier.

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