Personal Finance

Finances squeezed - baby

  • Last Updated:
  • Oct 16th, 2017 3:47 pm
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Deal Fanatic
May 29, 2006
8277 posts
1306 upvotes
the costs in the first year are high, but the 2nd-3rd years are worse. but then you might have 2 working incomes.

I had twins that both used formula, we burned through 15000k in savings in the first year to offset my wifes loss of income. things are fine now, but when you have one spouse go from 75k to 25kon EI, its a major loss of cash. so many payments are static with our without kids, like the mortgage has to be paid no matter what.
[OP]
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Mar 23, 2016
455 posts
145 upvotes
raichu1 wrote:
Oct 9th, 2017 3:43 pm
I believe you should take your own advise and find your heart after that post by you.

As stated before your deleted post deleted mine because I quoted you, I was addressing the "kids happens" statement and not making a judgement on OP.
You basically said people need to plan better and if not they should consider things including adoption and abortion.

Judgemental and heartless all in one - yes the rational mind finds it logical, but it's not quite understanding is it now raichu1?
[OP]
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Mar 23, 2016
455 posts
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rocking23nf wrote:
Oct 9th, 2017 8:31 pm
the costs in the first year are high, but the 2nd-3rd years are worse. but then you might have 2 working incomes.

I had twins that both used formula, we burned through 15000k in savings in the first year to offset my wifes loss of income. things are fine now, but when you have one spouse go from 75k to 25kon EI, its a major loss of cash. so many payments are static with our without kids, like the mortgage has to be paid no matter what.
Thank you for your contribution. If anything, I realized I am more grateful to my parents - what a job this is, and I don't think I would have understood the sacrifices and work without having done it
Deal Addict
Oct 16, 2013
1749 posts
384 upvotes
Toronto
bewiseman wrote:
Oct 9th, 2017 8:29 pm
I'm sorry that you disagree with me. Stop down voting me simply because we aren't understanding each other. I can do the same thing to you.

You mentioned abortion as if it were one of many easy options for women. This isn't correct information and it is highly inconsiderate to present it as an option when you're clearly passing judgement against the OP.



You are passing judgement, and this is why you are getting the reply that you did from me.
Never said it was easy but it is an option and right that women have. It appears you like to put words into my mouth and down voting my posts. It seems that you are the run passing judgements around here, ironic.

How can I disagree with you when we are talking different subject.
Deal Addict
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Jun 8, 2008
3566 posts
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Toronto
Congratulations on the baby OP! I know we planned and knew the costs going in but it still felt like a squeeze at times, definitely worth it but a squeeze nonetheless. Sounds like you've got some good advice on here. I think a lot for us was determining what was a need and what was a want. Babies don't *need* a whole lot - but parenting and parenting around people who enjoy judging others makes you think you *want* a lot of stuff. Figure out what you *need*, and make sure you can meet those needs. If you can, great ... start budgeting for the things you want. If you can't, then go ask for some help - government, family, church, whatever. We pay into these services, and you'll continue to pay into them for years, but there's a safety net for a reason.
Sr. Member
Jan 2, 2015
958 posts
356 upvotes
springdays wrote:
Oct 9th, 2017 1:09 pm
Thanks Operatime (& for the Congrats :)), FoFai2015, Stock R, Macx2mommy and BiegeToyota - it's people and posts like yours that keeps me interested in this community and thankful to be part of human life :smile: I incidentally agree that we can do this, and we love our child and interested in his wellbeing above all, as well as being a responsible, kind person.

Macx2mommy
I won't post my income and expenses at this point because I am not interested in lectures by some but what you posted, I take on board.
Re: insurance: - are you saying that companies will negotiate mid-way through a year? I worked through a broker once but the rates keep just going up. Any tips on how to diaper train a baby, and at what age?
Sorry that you don't feel like posting expenses and stuff, I do understand why based on the responses. Perhaps, do it in the parenting/family area with other parents who have been there. If you don't want to post numbers, maybe post the areas which you are finding expensive or surprising. That may allow people to provide suggestions of if they are needed or if there is a cheaper alternative.

Look up 'elimination communication'. It's not actually early path training as that implies that a young baby can determine when they have to go. It is more of reconginizing the sign when a baby has to go and getting them on the toilet. My first was just over 6 months when she was successful at going on the toilet, we started at about five months. The second was just over five months but we started at about 4 months. People thought I was crazy at first, but for us it was great. It is a lot of work and you need to be consistent
On a 'smart' device that isn't always so smart. So please forgive the autocorrects and typos. If it brothers you, then don't read my posts, but don't waste my time correcting me. If you can get past the typos, then my posts generally have some value.
Sr. Member
Nov 13, 2013
648 posts
219 upvotes
OTTAWA
springdays wrote:
Oct 9th, 2017 1:09 pm
Thanks Operatime (& for the Congrats :)), FoFai2015, Stock R, Macx2mommy and BiegeToyota - it's people and posts like yours that keeps me interested in this community and thankful to be part of human life :smile: I incidentally agree that we can do this, and we love our child and interested in his wellbeing above all, as well as being a responsible, kind person.

Macx2mommy
I won't post my income and expenses at this point because I am not interested in lectures by some but what you posted, I take on board.
Re: insurance: - are you saying that companies will negotiate mid-way through a year? I worked through a broker once but the rates keep just going up. Any tips on how to diaper train a baby, and at what age?

FoFai2015
You're right about modern child rearing, I will have to sift through all the "stuff" and work on instinct too - loving and caring is the most important, I believe.

Thanks again everyone - I will call the CRA about the child tax benefit as I didn't see anything come through.
Insurance is best negotiated on renewal rather than mid-year. It is shocking how much you can save by shopping around and make sure to try some of the direct companies. For example brokers quoted me $1200 for car insurance and $2000 for home insurance. With TD Meloche Monex it was $850 and $750. A savings of $1600 a year! There are threads for all your bills where you can save money. But Macx@mommy has a ton of good tips for cutting expenses that really should be basic Redflag parenting practices. You can't get lower than 0 after all. Look at any recurring expense you have and figure out what it costs for a year and if it is worth it. Is cable TV worth $1000 a year?
Deal Addict
Apr 22, 2014
2651 posts
366 upvotes
Oshawa, ON
diapers are the only cost right now. breastfeed for as long as possible, at least until 6 months. formula will mega add to the cost so avoid it at all costs. you and your child will be better of if you can breastfeed. make sure you are getting a good diet. someone out there has free clothes and toys for you. take baby outside whenever you can, rain or shine. I think vitamin d drops were the only thing we were adding to our kids diet before they started eating food. there's a lot of baby stuff people think you need to buy, but you don't need any of it. billions and billions of people have lived full lives on this planet without anything that exists to separate you from your money nowadays.
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Deal Addict
Dec 16, 2005
2607 posts
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bewiseman wrote:
Oct 9th, 2017 8:29 pm
I'm sorry that you disagree with me. Stop down voting me simply because we aren't understanding each other. I can do the same thing to you.

You mentioned abortion as if it were one of many easy options for women. This isn't correct information and it is highly inconsiderate to present it as an option when you're clearly passing judgement against the OP.



You are passing judgement, and this is why you are getting the reply that you did from me.
while i agree raichu was a bit over the line, there is a valid point in there.

You said "kids happen and you can't plan it perfectly."

This is true for the conception BUT OP had 9 months to plan her finances and only seems to be asking AFTER the baby is already here. She didn't even have a clue about the CTB which can be as much as $530 per month. This is money she needs but didn't even know existed. I'd say that was a pretty big failure that was totally in the OPs control.
Sr. Member
Jan 8, 2006
932 posts
228 upvotes
springdays wrote:
Oct 4th, 2017 4:32 pm
We just had a healthy baby boy, but I'm starting to get really stressed about finances. I was just working casually and have asked for a month off. We are trying to economize what to spend but it's quite hard. We're even using cloth diapers but I don't know how much longer I can keep that up.
Anyone know how much extra babies actually cost? :P
OP It's really come down to life choice you have. As other posters has suggested go easy and don't buy brand names for baby. I would suggest you to read Saving For School: Understand RESPs, Take Control of Your Savings, Minimize Student Debt Gail has excellent tips on saving as well. It's only 100 pages or so you will be done reading on a day.

Image
Deal Addict
Jan 20, 2016
1182 posts
412 upvotes
Burlington, ON
springdays wrote:
Oct 4th, 2017 4:32 pm
We just had a healthy baby boy, but I'm starting to get really stressed about finances. I was just working casually and have asked for a month off. We are trying to economize what to spend but it's quite hard. We're even using cloth diapers but I don't know how much longer I can keep that up.
Anyone know how much extra babies actually cost? :P
Congratulations!
healthy baby boy
- that's the most vital part, everything other could be borrowed, saved, earned...

Maybe most already being advised, sorry have no time to read whole thread :)
As being said, try not to fixate on brands and "quality" overprice. I mean stroller for $50 will work from functional side as well as $800 fancy one. Use kijji and craiglist to buy/sell stuff.
OnceUponaChild a good place to find (sometimes almost brand new) baby clothes etc. With some of them having "lifetime" of 3-6m they being used few time only. For $50 you will buy dozen things there vs couple in store.

However using clothing diapers is overshoot for me, save your time and life as well.

I'd suggest to read https://www.mrmoneymustache.com/ and his blog and forum. He has some good advises how to live comfortably without paying too much.
Deal Expert
User avatar
Jun 9, 2003
23338 posts
1083 upvotes
Markham, ON
...you can forget about RESP for the moment...and defer until you get stable income. You dont lose the benefit anyways..you can always catch up in the future.

Also...go back to work....you dont need a month off.
Last edited by thelefteyeguy on Oct 10th, 2017 2:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Deal Expert
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Jun 9, 2003
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vkizzle wrote:
Oct 4th, 2017 4:37 pm
Cost is all relative to how you budget and what the needs are.
Daycare cost from 1yr-4yr was ~$1500/month!
OP lives in Vancouver...im thinking it will be a lot higher...maybe someone out in BC can help.
Deal Expert
Aug 22, 2011
15120 posts
4220 upvotes
Ottawa
thelefteyeguy wrote:
Oct 10th, 2017 2:20 pm
OP lives in Vancouver...im thinking it will be a lot higher...maybe someone out in BC can help.
In that case, might be better to be a stay a home parent.
Deal Addict
Apr 21, 2014
1044 posts
245 upvotes
Alberta
First congrats on the baby!!!

You only have 2 options really- increase income or cut expenses! People have already given a lot of good advice on cutting expenses. You didn't mention if you own or are renting. If you are renting can you find a cheaper place? If you own can you rent out a portion of your home for rental income? Have you cut cable? If you have a cell phone you don't need a home phone as well. If you feel you have cut costs to the bare minimum the only thing you can do is increase income. Plenty of free resume services out there. Get your resume out there and look for a higher paying job. You will probably have to sacrifice on the type of job you want vs higher pay, but you gotta do what's necessary to survive.

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