Parenting & Family

How to Help a Shopaholic brother?

  • Last Updated:
  • Feb 11th, 2018 11:13 am
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Deal Addict
User avatar
Aug 15, 2015
1111 posts
147 upvotes
Markham, ON
I wanted to see if OP ever replied to this thread again so I checked OP posting history.

Now I am wondering if this is a shared rfd account with the brother.
Deal Fanatic
User avatar
Oct 1, 2011
6158 posts
1338 upvotes
Poppwl wrote:
Jan 12th, 2018 2:23 am
I wanted to see if OP ever replied to this thread again so I checked OP posting history.

Now I am wondering if this is a shared rfd account with the brother.
Face With Tears Of Joy Shopping spree!
Jr. Member
Aug 16, 2013
126 posts
27 upvotes
MARKHAM
Recognizing that most see being frugal and knowing how to find the best deals as a "quality"...if everyone in the world behaved that way our economy would collapse. Those of you who work in a field related to sales, or are in any type of sales/commission based role know this very well...

If he's working 56 hours a week he's one hard-working kid at least and understands the concept of having to put in that effort to get what he wants. How many of us can say we're that hard working and still have energy for school or anything else?

If he's willing to spend 6-7 hours of work (assuming he's earning $10-$15) on a gift for a friend, how he spends is his choice. Everyone measures value differently. My wife spends 10k or more on a purse. Many think this is stupid, but at the end of the day if money can buy you some level of happiness, why not? No different than spending it on travel. We can't just judge based on our own world view, values and standards.

The true question is does this eventually lead to his financial ruin? If he's only spending what he's making, then it won't, and there's really no cause for concern. Eventually he'll need to save for bigger purchases like cars and his first property and spend less on "useless" things, and as others have mentioned this won't happen if his parents preclude this by buying him a condo.

And finally, how many of you had that something you REALLY wanted as a kid but never got, and now that you finally have the financial means to buy it, you realize it doesn't give you the same level of satisfaction anymore? If you can see that he's truly happy because of these purchases and there's no debt involved, leave it be.
Deal Guru
User avatar
Jun 15, 2012
10798 posts
5029 upvotes
Southern Ontario
Impulsive spending, more than what you make, using credit you can’t pay back. Good luck

If it’s not buying, it could be something else, it’s a mental state and boils down to self-control. Better get a handle on it. Moderation in life is key.
Deal Addict
Dec 27, 2013
1808 posts
463 upvotes
Woodbridge
It's a tough situation. You want him to be able to learn from his mistakes and figure out how to spend money responsibly, while not digging himself into a hole so deep he'll need your help to get out of. Based on all you've said, he needs that structure put in place for him before it gets even more out of hand. He's 16. If he can afford hundreds of dollars worth of games for a console he doesn't own, he can afford rent. He can afford to pay for his own groceries. He can buy his own car, pay for his own insurance, and fill his own gas when he gets his license. He can use Uber or taxis on his own dime instead of getting lifts from family. That condo unit they plan on purchasing for him? No way. He can figure out his own housing. Then he'll have to make decisions.

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