How long do you have to wait before dating a friend's ex?

[Hairball]

I was inspired a bit by another question about how long you before you can date someone after a breakup. This is taking it a notch further.

What if the person you are interested your friend's ex-girlfriend/ex-boyfriend? Is there a rule of how long you have to wait before you can even consider dating them? Is it completely off limits? Or does it depend on how close you were to that "friend"?

Are you supposed to at least notify them or keep it being their back until a better time? It sounds like a sticky situation. But if you don't make a move they'll eventually end up seeing someone else soon enough.


I can see how this can be such an explosive topic, but I don't know what I should do.

[mbg]

Why do you have to date a friend's ex? Why not just find someone else?

[EbonyRose]

If they're a good friend, NEVER!

[Hairball]

Why do you have to date a friend's ex? Why not just find someone else?

I don't see how it is different than dating anyone else, sometimes you just click with certain people, you can't explain it.

I wouldn't be offended if someone dated my ex, even if it's a friend, it's normal to want companionship. But I was surprised that many people really do mind it, so I wanted to get some ideas.

[mbg]

I don't see how it is different than dating anyone else, sometimes you just click with certain people, you can't explain it.

I wouldn't be offended if someone dated my ex, even if it's a friend, it's normal to want companionship. But I was surprised that many people really do mind it, so I wanted to get some ideas.

I'm just saying... there are so many people out there. Why wouldn't you just avoid that situation?

If you really click that much, then it should be worth giving up your friend over.

[Drew87]

I think the answer in the majority of society is you never date a friends ex and if you do you need to be sure your friend knows and doesn't care before anything happens.

[yao416]

You don't; move on

[Hairball]

I think the answer in the majority of society is you never date a friends ex and if you do you need to be sure your friend knows and doesn't care before anything happens.

How do you find out without making it blatantly obvious if the friend minds?

Would it be like: "Hey how's _____ lately, has she found a new boyfriend yet?"

[mbg]

You don't; move on

Low content post.

[Drew87]

How do you find out without making it blatantly obvious if the friend minds?

Would it be like: "Hey how's _____ lately, has she found a new boyfriend yet?"

You have to be upfront and direct about it..It might be awkward but as people say...man up......Something like

"Hey, remember so and so, she messaged me the other day and wants to go out some time for a coffee, do you mind if I do?

then gauge his reaction and go from there....


As a lot of people said, most people just avoid the situation all together. The friend can say they don't mind but then get jealous or use you as a scapegoat as to why their relationship failed....It could strain your relationship with your friend, and then if you do break up with the girl down the road you risk losing a girl and a close friend at the same time....

[tebore]

Why wait?

Homewrecker FTW!

[Hairball]

Why wait?

Homewrecker FTW!

It's not homewrecking if they already broke up.

Unless you did things to help accelerate the process...

[desphinx]

I just wanna bang my friend's exs & sisters too

[SkimGuy]

I would say never, but I have never been in the situation before so my opinion is moot

[iEyeCaptain]

Never. Off limits. Always. No exceptions.