Should the computer be "watched/logged" ?

[AzN_RiverdaleCI]

Is it right to have keylogs the computer so you can see what you're son/daughter has been up to? Cause half the times when you ask what they have been doing, they say something, and you know they're lying.

So... is it right to spy on your children for their safety? or should it be something like, you tell them your monitoring them? or just dont do it?

discuss.

[Xax]

I say monitor and let them have fair warning. My feelings from another thread:

"Far better to have a child resent the parent for encroaching on their privacy than for the parents to turn a blind eye. Kids can get around parents and go behind their backs, but that doesn't absolve parents of doing their jobs. Kids are responsible for their choices, but then, so are parents."

But as kids get older and wiser, trust is earned, and the noose is loosened.

[Whiplash7828]

absolutely they should be monitored. I would let them know that the computer is keeping an activity log for everyone that uses the computer...that's only fair.

[3weddings]

All three of mine have their own PC's and access them quite liberally - time wise.

I monitor EVERYTHING they do on there, from MSNs to emails, to keylogging as they are young.

They have to earn my confidence as their common sense is established.

[mrcantrell]

There is no question my kids will be very closely monitored on the computer. There are way too many scary ppl out there.

And now to top it all off we need to watch for "cyber-bullying" too. There's no way my kids are going to get free access.

[Flame_lily]

ya, absolutely. Parental controls for my 11 & 6 year olds. There is a reason they are not allowed to vote.

[Topher]

I'm planning on setting my kids up with their own computers in the next month or so. (They share a stand-alone non-internet computer right now.) I was planning on having them boot from a network server, as I've had to reinstall everything a few times on this PC since my son likes to experiment with desktop settings and such. That way I can keep tabs on the installed programs and such. What do you guys do to log keystrokes? (Not that I think I need to go that far, but I'd rather be prepared.) Thanks.

[blexann]

I monitor my kids by teaching them how to safley use their computer.

[Whiplash7828]

I'm planning on setting my kids up with their own computers in the next month or so. (They share a stand-alone non-internet computer right now.) I was planning on having them boot from a network server, as I've had to reinstall everything a few times on this PC since my son likes to experiment with desktop settings and such. That way I can keep tabs on the installed programs and such. What do you guys do to log keystrokes? (Not that I think I need to go that far, but I'd rather be prepared.) Thanks.

There's software out there for such control. I also believe in keeping the "internet 'ized" () computer in a open access room (living room, etc).

[Xax]

I'm also not a fan of computers (or TVs) in bedrooms, but that's me; makes direct monitoring a lot easier to have it out in the open. That, and I just don't see the need to have computers in the bedrooms.

[CSK'sMom]

As I said in the other thread, our house, our computer and our rules. All 3 of our kids (almost 18, 15 and almost 12) are fully aware that everything is logged, including MSN conversations. We have a book by the computer that they are required to write their passwords in as well, for things like My Space, etc. . Our computer sits in the livingroom in such a way that the screen is fully visable as well. Our almost 12 yr old daughter also has fairly strict rules with her MSN. She is not allowed to have anyone on her friends list that she doesn't physically know from the neighborhood or from school....

[Jokez Guy]

I think its stupid if you gona watch and logg them if they know you watching and logging them they wouldnt do anything stupid for you to find out what they are doing, its like they wouldnt smoke in front of you but when ur not there they would smoke, its similar case, you can erase the history, erase the logs, its not a hard thing, so i think tahts just torturing the kid and taking it the next level let the kid learn from its own mistake, the more you try to protect the kid the more he gona start hating you for that, but thats just my 2 cents, cause all ive seen in the past the parants who are stricts ive seen most of there kids are always screwed no offence or anything its just my 2 centz

[Topher]

There's software out there for such control. I also believe in keeping the "internet 'ized" () computer in a open access room (living room, etc).

That's why I'm going for a diskless boot, and will have everything on the server, which I can monitor a little easier. I don't want to limit them (well, for some things I do), but rather protect them. I know they're eventually going to find the things I don't want them to find, but I want them to be able to handle it when they do.

[Xax]

I think its stupid if you gona watch and logg them if they know you watching and logging them they wouldnt do anything stupid for you to find out what they are doing, its like they wouldnt smoke in front of you but when ur not there they would smoke, its similar case, you can erase the history, erase the logs, its not a hard thing, so i think tahts just torturing the kid and taking it the next level let the kid learn from its own mistake, the more you try to protect the kid the more he gona start hating you for that, but thats just my 2 cents, cause all ive seen in the past the parants who are stricts ive seen most of there kids are always screwed no offence or anything its just my 2 centz

Ow, my eyes. Anyways, going back to my first post, "kids can get around parents and go behind their backs, but that doesn't absolve parents of doing their jobs. Kids are responsible for their choices, but then, so are parents." That's why it bothers me when some parents let their kids drink and smoke in their house, because they say they'd rather they do it there than somewhere unknown. I think that's absolutely ridiculous. Parents have responsibilities to their kids, regardless of what choices their kids decide to make.

[CSK'sMom]

So Jokez Guy, just how many kids do you have and what are their ages?

Xax, hubby and I had an interetng conversation yesterday around parenting. We caught part of Dr Phil and we intrigued with something he said. He said "Parenting is a verb, not a noun". The end result of our conversation was that we both agree with him... it's all about action...