Parenting & Family

Should I limit my daughter on her social media usage?

  • Last Updated:
  • Nov 17th, 2017 6:03 pm
Sr. Member
Jan 16, 2007
620 posts
102 upvotes
Toronto
I grew up in the 80s and was really hooked on the games in the arcades. So I kind of understand how she feels. I played street figher, etc. and other games for hours at the Yonge and Dundas arcades and was a really good competitor. But the limiting factor was that once I spent all my $$$, I went home and that was that.

If allowed to, my daughter would not stop, ever. I asked nicely to maybe do other things. Signed her for up for activities. There is just nothing to stop her. So I'm forcing her to stop.

She's gotten over giving me the look, but she's moved on to other stuff. Watching more youtube and listening to spotify on her computer. She can still look at instagram posts on her computer.
Jr. Member
Jul 3, 2002
137 posts
13 upvotes
just watched the film screenagers. Is about a parent's journey to choosing a phone that led her to investigate the pros / cons for screens for teenagers. I would suggest parents go watch it... it helped me.
Deal Fanatic
User avatar
Mar 31, 2008
9555 posts
1240 upvotes
Toronto
NubNub wrote:
Nov 7th, 2017 4:11 pm
I grew up in the 80s and was really hooked on the games in the arcades. So I kind of understand how she feels. I played street figher, etc. and other games for hours at the Yonge and Dundas arcades and was a really good competitor. But the limiting factor was that once I spent all my $$$, I went home and that was that.

If allowed to, my daughter would not stop, ever. I asked nicely to maybe do other things. Signed her for up for activities. There is just nothing to stop her. So I'm forcing her to stop.

She's gotten over giving me the look, but she's moved on to other stuff. Watching more youtube and listening to spotify on her computer. She can still look at instagram posts on her computer.
Ahh, the good ol days. When being antsy and bored was actually a good thing. Made the good moments even better and more memorable.

Same here, though my main place were these 2 arcades in scarborough, but definitely ventured out there too. And yupp, things had to be rationed. Money/quarters. I bet kids today wouldn't know how to exchange quarters from a $5. The arcade closes so it's not like you could be up at 3 am playing. Also, home games also got boring after while some just plainly sucked, and you were limited to what you had or could borrow (which was usually 1 game at a time).

TV, same, at the mercy of what was on, and also, can only rent so many videos at once. It is a drug for the mind of Alien origin and feeds into the very thing at the core in all of us.. to not feel alone or isolated (humans are social creatures, though electronics has replaced the social aspect of our nature).
Sr. Member
Jan 2, 2015
974 posts
364 upvotes
at1212b wrote:
Nov 8th, 2017 10:18 am
Ahh, the good ol days. When being antsy and bored was actually a good thing. Made the good moments even better and more memorable.

Same here, though my main place were these 2 arcades in scarborough, but definitely ventured out there too. And yupp, things had to be rationed. Money/quarters. I bet kids today wouldn't know how to exchange quarters from a $5. The arcade closes so it's not like you could be up at 3 am playing. Also, home games also got boring after while some just plainly sucked, and you were limited to what you had or could borrow (which was usually 1 game at a time).

TV, same, at the mercy of what was on, and also, can only rent so many videos at once. It is a drug for the mind of Alien origin and feeds into the very thing at the core in all of us.. to not feel alone or isolated (humans are social creatures, though electronics has replaced the social aspect of our nature).
Some really great points. I learned when my kids were young, developmentally , it’s important to let kids kids get bored. It forces creativity, innovation, and gives kids time to self reflect. There are other things to. The only problem I find with this is kids seem to go through a phase while they are bored they are also annoying and get areas where we don’t want them to, So instead, we stick them in front of the tv, or technology. It’s challenging, but i try really hard to get my kids to find ways that they aren’t bored. If they complain they are bored or start fighting. then I will have them clean their rooms, take it the garage, wash the toilet, unload the dishwasher, scrub the floor, etc. Surprisely, they don’t complain quite as much anymore, mind you my house is a lot more dirty. Face With Tears Of Joy
On a 'smart' device that isn't always so smart. So please forgive the autocorrects and typos. If it brothers you, then don't read my posts, but don't waste my time correcting me. If you can get past the typos, then my posts generally have some value.
Deal Fanatic
User avatar
Mar 31, 2008
9555 posts
1240 upvotes
Toronto
Macx2mommy wrote:
Nov 9th, 2017 12:31 am
Some really great points. I learned when my kids were young, developmentally , it’s important to let kids kids get bored. It forces creativity, innovation, and gives kids time to self reflect. There are other things to. The only problem I find with this is kids seem to go through a phase while they are bored they are also annoying and get areas where we don’t want them to, So instead, we stick them in front of the tv, or technology. It’s challenging, but i try really hard to get my kids to find ways that they aren’t bored. If they complain they are bored or start fighting. then I will have them clean their rooms, take it the garage, wash the toilet, unload the dishwasher, scrub the floor, etc. Surprisely, they don’t complain quite as much anymore, mind you my house is a lot more dirty. Face With Tears Of Joy
Heh, the constant battle. That is good advice and I think we will try to implement that type of activity. I definitely see why it's so easy to cave in to the 'easy' way out when life gets busy, stressful (work, commute, sickness, family sickness, loss, lack of sleep, etc).

For the youngins and shows, I've observed no matter how much one tries to shield them from it, the fact that they know it's "On Demand", regardless of how limited the exposure, they still know it, and will demand it with a force or expectation. This also goes for an episode or show they may not like.

Anybody in the older generation knew at the earliest age, once your show was done, that was it, and it fundamentally bred a certain patience, and of course anticipation (saturday morning cartoons!) and looking back, a really fond, genuine memory.

I also know all this 'shielding' can be undone in an instant, which also shows how powerful this force of social media/online world dependency can occur. In this day in age, I guess the battle is try to not make it so fundamental to their understanding of basic social interaction.
Newbie
Dec 22, 2016
14 posts
2 upvotes
at1212b wrote:
Nov 8th, 2017 10:18 am
The arcade closes so it's not like you could be up at 3 am playing.
I think this is the biggest problem with tech/internet. Back then there was a natural cutoff point.... whether it be closing time or money. But the fix you get from the internet is limitless.
Deal Fanatic
Sep 16, 2004
6764 posts
713 upvotes
Toronto
at1212b wrote:
Nov 7th, 2017 3:17 pm
My parents in their 70s and many others I know who lived all their lives without access to the internet can't live today without it! What chance does a teen have?
It is indeed addictive. which makes it so much harder for parents who may also be addicted or who may not be very tech savvy to deal with the problem.
If you take away something though, one should at least try to replace it with something positive.
Many parents these days keep their kids so occupied they have less time for idle stuff though.
Many parents know their kids aren't going to become the next best Ballerina,gymnast,soccer player or swimmer but it sure occupies their time positively.
Jr. Member
Jul 3, 2002
137 posts
13 upvotes
I once read/ heard someone said the phones are actually firing up the neurons like narcotics do. That woke me up; that there must be very strict limits and consequences for breaking the limits.
Deal Addict
Oct 1, 2004
4137 posts
269 upvotes
Toronto
What’s a good iOS app to set time limits with? Say 30mins within time frame then automatically locks. We want to limit access, not turn it off completely.
Moderator
User avatar
May 8, 2009
1696 posts
447 upvotes
45.420833°N, 75.69°W
Depression and social media is a recipe for disaster.

Remedies include:
  • cut out the social media
  • cellphone policy will be a case by case depending on the family. The closer you can get to a no cellphone rule, the better
  • plan frequent social activities. sports, camping, community events, etc. (avoid movies)
  • encourage a positive social circle for the child
  • limit or eliminate your own phone usage around the child, better if you can get out of social media yourself
Some things you cannot control, but certainly do what you can. cyber bullying is for real, and kids get targeted for anything under the sun.
Motorola phone. Linux on 2xcomputers. Brew beer & wine @home.
Home service reseller internet + FPL + antenna with streaming on smart TV
Wireless 1 line w/ Virgin on QC plan, few lines w/ Koodo to get phones, couple FreedomPop SIM's for roaming

Top