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Locked: What do you do when you are rejected for a date?

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  • Nov 15th, 2011 1:39 pm
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Dec 28, 2006
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What do you do when you are rejected for a date?

Say I am interested in this girl I met recently, but I think she is potentially a good friend, I am having a hard time justifying asking her out and possibly ruining any future normal friendship with her, what would you do?

and what are good ideas for a first date? I prefer something where awkward silences can be avoided easier.
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Jan 14, 2004
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Markham
You don't worry about it until you are actually rejected. Then you think of Plan B.
:lol:
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Dec 26, 2005
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Thornhill
Consider the options:
1ai - you ask her out and she says no, and it makes your friendship awkward
1aii - you ask her out and she says no, and your friendship is unaffected
1b - you ask her out and she says yes
2 - you never ask her out so you never find out, and you continue asking for advice on RFD :)

Consider this situation: Taeyang - Wedding Dress
It's in Korean, but just watch the video.

bjl
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Hairball wrote:
Sep 21st, 2011 11:51 pm
You don't worry about it until you are actually rejected. Then you go on RFD and cry about it.

Fixed it for ya.
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im an expert on getting rejected by girls, let me chime in some advice here. When you get rejected, its nothing to a girl. Shes used to rejecting guys all week. Especially when she goes out. Its only the guy who feels dumb about it. To her its like nothing happened, so if you simply go on as if it never happened, theres no awkwardness.

I asked a girl out at work who I hade been becoming friends with for 2 months. She flat out rejected me. I was like, OK, let me know if you just wanna hang out or something then. We are still friends a year later. Met another girl at a party who slept with me, then wanted nothing but friendship the next week. No big deal, that just means I have a chance to sleep with somebody even hotter!! I asked another girl out who I was friends with (met her at a party) for a month. She warmed up to me and we had a thing for about a week, then she rejected me (apparently me wanting to stay awake and fool around was a terrible thing cause she wanted to sleep so she wouldnt be tired at work :| ). To me that just indicates she wasent really into me in the first place, so I move on. Were still regular friends now. Remember, when a girl rejects you, remaining friends is completely up to the guy. Its also in your best interest as girls always have girlfriends for you to hit on :)
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Haven't seen Deals x3 for a while now
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Pickering
Go on RFD and ask triple D how he usually deals with it...
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Deals Deals Deals wrote:
Sep 21st, 2011 11:48 pm
Say I am interested in this girl I met recently, but I think she is potentially a good friend, I am having a hard time justifying asking her out and possibly ruining any future normal friendship with her, what would you do?

and what are good ideas for a first date? I prefer something where awkward silences can be avoided easier.

What to do? Simple...MOVE ON. There are simpler ways to ask some one out. I think the issue is that you have this notion that 1 on 1 automatically implies a date. You don't have to ask her "Let's go on a date". Just ask her if she wants to have a cup of coffee or something. If you two click, ask her out again, but for an activity this time. If she wants to bring someone along, chances are good she doesn't like going 1 on 1 with you and you should probably pursue someone else. Most relationships just kind of happen when the 2 people have chemistry. You don't always have to formally ask someone to go on a date. For a guy like you, just don't use the word "date".

Good ideas for a first date? Like I said, coffee dates are not that hard to get. You should understand people rather than randomly select activities from a list. There is no such thing as a universally good date idea. After a coffee date, you'll understand her better and you should be able to suggest a suitable activity.
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AudiDude wrote:
Sep 22nd, 2011 12:58 am
Go on RFD and ask triple D how he usually deals with it...

I cannot believe this poor guy keeps coming back to RFD to take more abusive snarky comments. :lol: :lol: I have to admit it is funny as hell.
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BananaHunter wrote:
Sep 22nd, 2011 1:00 am
What to do? Simple...MOVE ON. There are simpler ways to ask some one out. I think the issue is that you have this notion that 1 on 1 automatically implies a date. You don't have to ask her "Let's go on a date". Just ask her if she wants to have a cup of coffee or something. If you two click, ask her out again, but for an activity this time. If she wants to bring someone along, chances are good she doesn't like going 1 on 1 with you and you should probably pursue someone else. Most relationships just kind of happen when the 2 people have chemistry. You don't always have to formally ask someone to go on a date. For a guy like you, just don't use the word "date".

Good ideas for a first date? Like I said, coffee dates are not that hard to get. You should understand people rather than randomly select activities from a list. There is no such thing as a universally good date idea. After a coffee date, you'll understand her better and you should be able to suggest a suitable activity.

I didn't use the d word last year, and it just went down a spiral to nothing, I don't think she ever knew. I don't want her to think I'm just trying to be regular friends with her, I want her to know, that's why I wanted to use the d word to get down to the point. A thing I worry about coffee dates is I don't drink coffee and it's sort of difficult for me to keep the conversation going.
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Just ask her out. Plain simple. You don't have to consider that as a "date" right in the beginning.
Consider that as "-3 date". Then, try "-2 date". Then, "-1 date". Then, "0 date".
If everything sounds good, the 1st date.
You should be able to figure if she has any interest to you before the 1st date.
Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like. -- Will Smith
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Stay hungry, stay foolish.
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gman wrote:
Sep 22nd, 2011 1:07 am
Just ask her out. Plain simple. You don't have to consider that as a "date" right in the beginning.
Consider that as "-3 date". Then, try "-2 date". Then, "-1 date". Then, "0 date".
If everything sounds good, the 1st date.

Yes, sounds good, but besides "coffee" dates, is there anything else that's easy and fun to do?
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Deals Deals Deals wrote:
Sep 22nd, 2011 1:08 am
Yes, sounds good, but besides "coffee" dates, is there anything else that's easy and fun to do?

Movie, dinner, shopping (even if you hate shopping).
Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like. -- Will Smith
Growing older is mandatory. Growing up is optional.
Stay hungry, stay foolish.
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gman wrote:
Sep 22nd, 2011 1:10 am
Movie, dinner, shopping (even if you hate shopping).

I guess I just don't really like stuff where it's so much contact, I'd prefer something that we can play together so there is less time I have to face her and think of stuff to say... and I thought movies were bad because there's no interaction at all...
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mysticalinfluence wrote:
Sep 22nd, 2011 1:05 am
I cannot believe this poor guy keeps coming back to RFD to take more abusive snarky comments. :lol: :lol: I have to admit it is funny as hell.

I couldn't take it anymore, I was feeling left out. Besides it is a lot better than the pic of the blow up doll I was going to post along with a lewd comment...
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