Parenting & Family

Facebook and Cyber-Bullying.

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  • Jul 18th, 2011 2:17 pm
[OP]
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Apr 30, 2004
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Facebook and Cyber-Bullying.

How would you handle cyber-bullying thru. Facebook? I recently noticed a family friend's Facebook has been written with personal attacking messages by her classmates (high-school). How would you proceed?

Thanks.
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DJ Trance AZ wrote: How would you handle cyber-bullying thru. Facebook? I recently noticed a family friend's Facebook has been written with personal attacking messages by her classmates (high-school). How would you proceed?

Thanks.

Post the offenders details on 4chan and let them take care of it.

Kidding aside, tell your family friend to not add FB "friends" that aren't real friends and keep their pages private for friends only. Problem solved.

I don't get this whole add everyone you've ever met in your life as a friend on facebook mentality that kids have these days.
[OP]
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Her parents speak little English and I am very concerned about the girl. Do you think this is something the school can look into?
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DJ Trance AZ wrote: Her parents speak little English and I am very concerned about the girl. Do you think this is something the school can look into?

Why not? I think you should bring it up with the school. Check with the girl to see if she's okay.

But as the other poster already mentioned, you have the flexibility of removing people that you don't like on Facebook. When I was younger, I also added a lot of people. But as I grew older, I realized that I didn't know/talk to much of these people and removed a lot people off my FB profile.
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DJ Trance AZ wrote: Her parents speak little English and I am very concerned about the girl. Do you think this is something the school can look into?

The school has little power over students in their personal time away from school - you can bring it up with them however you risk making the situation worse because there is really no course of action the school can take to punish those involved. Unless we're referring to something major I wouldn't hold out hope of the school helping.

I think the above recommendations of solving it on your own, through removing the users from the Facebook page, seem to make the most sense. It's the equivalent of walking away from a fight rather than staying and fighting.
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TrevorK wrote: The school has little power over students in their personal time away from school - you can bring it up with them however you risk making the situation worse because there is really no course of action the school can take to punish those involved. Unless we're referring to something major I wouldn't hold out hope of the school helping.

I think the above recommendations of solving it on your own, through removing the users from the Facebook page, seem to make the most sense. It's the equivalent of walking away from a fight rather than staying and fighting.


If this is against the law...which it is. If reported to a teacher the would report it accordingly. This is assault and the police are brought in all of the time for such situations driven by originally speaking with a teacher.
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nalababe wrote: If this is against the law...which it is. If reported to a teacher the would report it accordingly. This is assault and the police are brought in all of the time for such situations driven by originally speaking with a teacher.

My apologies - I don't live in Ontario and had no idea there was a "cyber bullying" law in place.
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TrevorK wrote: My apologies - I don't live in Ontario and had no idea there was a "cyber bullying" law in place.

only because children are weak these days
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There is no one at the schools now, during in school times the staff definitely take these things seriously. Frankly, the girl in question needs to delete and block on FB the offenders, and lock her profile down tight to the highest security settings across the board.

And because we're talking teen girls... I'd be willing to bet she's not an innocent angel in the mess. ;) She needs to learn there are consequences to her actions and hopefully her parents get computer literate really fast and get a handle on what's going on and deal with it... Kids and teens still need supervision, especially on the net...
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I have a feeling that we're not getting the whole picture here. If this is a teen that we're talking about, she is old enough to have her own Facebook account, old enough to make friends/enemies, she should be old enough to know how to delete those "friends" on her account. If she's not willing to delete them, she chose to stay in that social circle and to suffer from the consequences. I know cyber-bulling exists and it can be very cruel. On the other hand, a teenager needs to learn how to discuss problems with responsible adults also to stand up for herself. If she doesn't want to listen to advice then it's her choice. Unfortunately, some people (adults included) just have to learn their lessons the hard way.
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TrevorK wrote: My apologies - I don't live in Ontario and had no idea there was a "cyber bullying" law in place.

It is not ontario based. Cyber Bullying falls under assault and is treated as such. No different than physical bullying except in many instances there is far more evidence and traceability.

It has nothing to do with being weak either...examples of what my wife has had to deal with would make you sick.
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althetrainer wrote: I have a feeling that we're not getting the whole picture here. If this is a teen that we're talking about, she is old enough to have her own Facebook account, old enough to make friends/enemies, she should be old enough to know how to delete those "friends" on her account. If she's not willing to delete them, she chose to stay in that social circle and to suffer from the consequences. I know cyber-bulling exists and it can be very cruel. On the other hand, a teenager needs to learn how to discuss problems with responsible adults also to stand up for herself. If she doesn't want to listen to advice then it's her choice. Unfortunately, some people (adults included) just have to learn their lessons the hard way.

In many instances even if they are blocked, it is the communication that is peripheral ....since it is a network, they just have to post that appears on one of your friends. And you will see it. Also, does not have to be directed specifically to that person to greatly impact them.
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nalababe wrote: It is not ontario based. Cyber Bullying falls under assault and is treated as such. No different than physical bullying except in many instances there is far more evidence and traceability.

It has nothing to do with being weak either...examples of what my wife has had to deal with would make you sick.

Umm..no.

"Assault" is a Criminal Code offense with specific elements, cyber bulling itself does not fall into this category.

In terms of criminal offenses, cyber bulling may proceed as harassment or defamatory libel.

At the provincial level the Safe Schools Act makes it an offense to commit cyber bulling, providing disciplinary power to the principal and beyond.
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I don't have a facebook account and hope my son won't one too.

Let's see how it goes... :D
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nalababe wrote: It is not ontario based. Cyber Bullying falls under assault and is treated as such. No different than physical bullying except in many instances there is far more evidence and traceability.

It has nothing to do with being weak either...examples of what my wife has had to deal with would make you sick.

I think you're stretching quite far as to whether cyber-bullying is considered "assault".
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Whether or not the child's parents speak english have little to do with the issue..

The situation sounds as if the teenager chooses to have these friends on her facebook. That's significantly different than bullies cornering her in school every day. Personally I think the problem lies with her choice to remain friends with these bullies, and it's the parents' responsibilities to educate their child to stay away from these fake friends.

Depending on how close you are with her family, you may be better off approaching the teenager yourself, just to ask her how everything is. Just say you notice on her wall that some girls at school are saying mean things to her, and that maybe you're too old to understand it, but is that how kids talk to each other these days? Then you can slowly work into the conversation how she needs to stay away from friends who are not respecting her.
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longitude wrote: I don't have a facebook account and hope my son won't one too.

Let's see how it goes... :D

+1

On the flip side, I have friends who registered their babies on facebook within days they were born. :facepalm:

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